Well I didn't manage to keep quite to what I had thought and keep up on posting as well as I would have liked,but life happens and you don't always get a chance to keep exactly to your thoughts or plans.
It was kind of funny the other day actually I was perusing Facebook and came across a picture that showed a young man, looked like it was supposed to be the cover to a card, and it said "I wish I could go back to the age where I thought I would have it all together by now." And I thought to myself, yea there are definitely days where I wish I could have more together, more going in the direction I thought it should be. But then I saw an episode of How I Met Your Mother and in it Marshall was reading a letter he had written to himself about how by the time he was 30 he should have this great job and a fabulous blonde bombshell wife ...etc. And I sat there and thought as he was telling himself that it was ok that he hadn't totally followed that plan that where I'm at and what I'm doing right now is definitely not where I thought I would be, but that there is absolutely nothing wrong with where I am or what I'm doing right now.
I have a beautiful little girl that I love to pieces, no matter how crazy she makes me. I have two dogs that again although they drive me nuts on occasion, want nothing more than to come curl up in bed with me and get pet. And most importantly I have a spouse who would do anything for me. He has supported me entirely while I finished my college degree and now he is completely ok with me not working and staying home with our little girl and raising her to be the best little girl that I can. And best of all he is absolutely thrilled that I can be home to take care of myself while I work on keeping myself healthy and safe while we await the arrival of our little boy in April.
Realistically I couldn't even imagine what my life would be like otherwise and as much as I've tried to think about it and think about where he and I would be or what we would be doing if we didn't have kids, a family, our life, but then I realize that when I went to college my thoughts were to be an architect and move to a big city and work for some big designing firm. But now I can't possibly imagine living in the city and I would rather be out in the country with a small farm and friends and family around all the time.
It's funny really, that all through high school, really all while growing up, people ask you what you want to be and you get all these plans set into your head as far as what you want and who you are going to be. But then the time comes and you step out into the real world and you realize, or at least hopefully you do, that there are very few who are privileged enough to be able to keep straight to that plan. The rest of the world has to wake up and smell the coffee in the morning and realize that the world, the economy and the social dynamic have drastically changed over the past 20 years and so what you thought was possible then, very well may still be possible, but more than likely isn't what you want anymore.
There are so many different paths out there and it doesn't matter how long it takes you to drive, walk, skip, whatever way you want to get there, as long as you get where you want to go and you're happy about being there.
Bit of a deep way to come back I know but this whole blog thing was supposed to be about me writing down things that I wanted to make sure got put down so that's what I did.
And I plan on trying to keep up again, though I do have a few other things in the works at the moment so we'll see where priorities land.
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